Michael Moore's $12,000 checkmate

The title says it all: Michael Moore anonymously pays the medical premiums of his biggest critic. The critic in question is Jim Kenefick of Moorewatch.

For several years now, Jim Kenefick has been railing against the Oscar-winning director on Moorewatch.com. Recently, Kenefick wrote about the difficulty he was having paying his wife's medical bills. Fellow conservatives guided him toward a cheaper health insurer, but Kenefick said he still had trouble making payments.

"Someone e-mailed me and asked if an 'anonymous' benefactor could offer to pay my first year's premiums - $12,000," Kenefick wrote on his site.

He was skeptical when the check arrived. "I opened a whole new account at my bank, waited for it to clear, checked twice with bank personnel to make sure it wasn't a scam, and waited a full 60 days before spending the money. At that time, I started drawing on it and paying the monthly premiums until it was gone."

We can now confirm to Kenefick that his secret benefactor is none other than the dreaded, detestable, loathsome Michael Moore.

Did Moore make this gesture to publicize his film and his cause? Of course. I don't think the guy's a saint. (As readers know, I have mixed feelings about Michael Moore.)

Still: Money is money is money. To hell with motive. When you're sick, when you're worried about getting sick, when you've got a family for which you are responsible, money is money is money.

No strings were attached. Kenefick was not required to sell drugs or to whack a guy named Guido or to sleep with Dick Cheney or to forge documents about yellowcake uranium. He was asked simply to cash an anonymous $12,000 check which gave his family the kind of health care which I cannot afford and which many of my readers can only dream about.

So how has Kenefick responded? Check it out.

First of all, Moore doesn’t have friends. He has employees and allies...

A few years ago, Moore threatened to sue me. Add to that the fact that $12,000 is equal to his ding-dong budget for the week. Or what it costs to make one of those suits for award shows.

What am I supposed to be grateful for? The chance to look like an ass?

Never let it be said that Jim Kenefick missed his opportunity.

Moore obviously knew that Kenefick would respond as he has responded. Kenefick, by revealing himself one of America's most ungracious creeps -- and thereby painting all conservatives as creeps -- has done the work of his foe. Kenefick could have said (as I would have said, if given aid by, say, Ann Coulter): "I remain an opponent, but I must give thanks for this magnanimous gesture." Instead, he went scuttling down Badger Avenue, clawing and snarling and hissing and screeching.

In short, he acted just as Moore must have known he would act. Conservatives will do as they do. They are creatures of instinct, like dogs chasing after birds and toddlers grabbing for Dad's shiny keys. Moore did not humiliate a critic: He expertly created a situation in which a critic could not resist the opportunity to humiliate himself.

Hey, Jimbo -- up for a game of chess? This episode tells me that you are an utterly predictable player who can never see more than one move ahead.