Charlottesville conspiracy theories (including my own)

I've been accused of being both a conspiracy theorist and an opponent of conspiracy theories. Guilty on both counts.

One reader snarkily observed that I denigrate every theory that I didn't come up with myself. This methodology has certain advantages: Better to fool oneself than to be fooled by another.

My problem with the modern "conspiracy buff" subculture -- which ain't so very sub, these days -- is that, for most people, non-mainstream theories are not used to attain the truth. Instead, such theories allow the theorist to manipulate the truth, to create a "truth" that makes the theorist and his listeners feel good. Hence the longstanding relationship between fascism and conspiracy theories: Such theories allow the triumph of Will over reality itself.

Case in point: Charlottesville.

An Idaho state lawmaker is facing backlash for sharing a conspiracy theory that former President Obama helped to orchestrate the violent white supremacist rally in Charlottesville, Va., as part of a plot to take down President Trump.

Idaho Rep. Bryan Zollinger on Friday posted a story on Facebook that suggested Obama and other top Democrats like billionaire George Soros and Virginia Gov. Terry McAuliffe were part of a conspiracy to set up the rally, the Idaho Statesman reported.

“I’m not saying it is true, but I am suggesting that it is completely plausible,” Zollinger wrote on Facebook.

The story claims that Obama has set up a “war room” to fight against the Trump administration — a claim that has largely been debunked — and that Charlottesville was a part of his plan.

You probably already know of Alex Jone's claim that the Charlottesville Nazis were actually Jewish actors.

“Literally, they’re just Jewish actors. Nothing against Jews in general, but they are leftists Jews that want to create this clash and they go dress up as Nazis,” he added.

Jones also showed footage from 18 years ago of his protesting the KKK, whom he claimed later turned out to be federal agents.

“I have footage in Austin, we’re going to find it somewhere here at the office, where it literally looks like the cast of Seinfeld or like Howard Stern in a Nazi outfit,” Jones said.

Remember when American conspiracy buffs tried to dig up the facts? Remember when Mark Lane put Dealey Plaza witnesses on camera? Remember when critics of the HSCA mounted detailed, scientific arguments against the efficacy of neutron activation analysis? (The JFK buffs won that particular dispute, by the way: The FBI no longer uses neutron activation analysis.)

Facts no longer matter. The search for evidence is for the unenlightened, for those impoverished souls who lack the Beatific Vision. Today, the Alex Jonesians need merely say: "What I want to be so, IS so. Unleash the Monster of the Id!"

Sean Hannity has lent his considerable talents to this enterprise:

Fox News host Sean Hannity used his radio show to promote the inane conspiracy theory that “antifa agitators” who opposed the neo-Nazi and white supremacist protesters in Charlottesville, VA, on Saturday were actually actors hired by a publicity firm.

For some reason, all parties involved in promoting the moronic claim have interpreted a Craigslist ad posted August 7 by the firm Crowds on Demand which offered $25 per hour to “actors and photographers” to participate in events in the “Charlotte, NC area” as evidence that the firm was hiring counter-protesters for the event in Charlottesville, roughly 300 miles away. Crowds on Demand has flatly denied the charge, saying that the company was “not involved in any capacity with the recent tragic events in Charlottesville.”

The Craigslist ad “began to spread on social media and chat forums like Reddit and 4Chan” on August 14, as Snopes detailed. Last night, the former actor and Trump supporter Scott Baio pushed a version of this fable on his Facebook page, promoting private messages he had received from an unnamed associate which claimed that the hired protesters traveled on “buses [that] were hired by media matters which is owned by George Soros” (none of this is true).

Earlier today, the claim made the jump to ZeroHedge, a regular clearinghouse for conspiracy theories. The post’s pseudonymous author, “Tyler Durden,” claimed the ad “is raising new questions over whether paid protesters were sourced by a Los Angeles based ‘public relations firm specializing in innovative events’ to serve as agitators in counterprotests,” and tied the “discovery” to President Donald Trump’s claim that there was “blame on both sides” for the Charlottesville violence. The ZeroHedge piece was reposted later today on Infowars.com, radio host Alex Jones’ conspiracy theory website.

From those conspiracy sites, the claim jumped to two of the most prominent radio shows in the country, with audiences of millions.

There's always some small nugget in the news which allows one to construct a preferred "truth" to replace the true truth. That Craigslist ad is one such nugget.

Apparently, Heather Heyer was the most dedicated actor in the history of thespianism. Her mother must be maintaining the pretense out of respect for her daughter's craft.

We now return the Prince of Paranoia:

In an hour-long video, Infowars host Alex Jones charges the entire event was orchestrated by Jewish financier George Soros, and his progressive allies in government and the nonprofit sector. Their goal? To discredit conservatives and, ultimately, place the entire United States under authoritarian military control.

Jones charged, providing no evidence, that the Southern Poverty Law Center had hired actors to dress up like white supremacists and play to the cameras, followed closely by antifa protesters, who Jones insisted were bused in by Soros.

“They said they’ve got to now start luring the right wing into towns where they control everything,” Jones said, noting that Charlottesville, the home of the University of Virginia, is one of the most progressive cities in Virginia.

The plan, he argued, was to create a fake vanguard of aggressive white supremacists to incite the police to attack the rally’s legitimate attendees. From there, the government could use the ensuing, racially tinged chaos to declare martial law across the entire country.

“That’s the plan. Trigger the violence because you can’t stop the legitimate free speech,” Jones continued, rattling off a list of conspirators that included, “the deep state, the Islamists, Hillary, Obama, all the usual suspects.”

Wait a minute. Wouldn't martial law give Trump extra-Constitutional powers? Such as the power to suspend elections? Awful Alex still hasn't grappled with the intellectual problem of constructing anti-gubmint conspiracy theories at a time when your own team controls the gubmint.

(At this point, the Alex Jonesians tend to retreat into vague blather about the "Deep State." Catch-all terms of that sort are very useful to anyone who enjoys transforming reality into Silly Putty.)

Awful Alex has inspired me to work within the genre of Charlottesville conspiracy theories. Fair is fair. If they can do it, I can do it.

I draw your attention to Steve Bannon's bizarre interview with the American Prospect, a progressive journal. This interview appeared just before Steverino was asked to empty out his desk.

“The Democrats,” he told the American Prospect’s Bob Kuttner, “the longer they talk about identity politics, I got ’em. I want them to talk about racism every day. If the left is focused on race and identity, and we go with economic nationalism, we can crush the Democrats.”

These words were prophetic. Most liberals don't know that the controversy over the removal of pro-Confederate statuary has actually caused Trump's poll numbers to rise. Most liberals refuse to face the fact that the majority of American oppose the Nazis at Charlottesville and Trump's reaction to that event and the removal of those statues.

Bannon's statement to the American Prospect may offer insight into the original intent behind Charlottesville. 

Theory: Bannon knew that the administration needed a distraction. He decided to force a national debate on an issue that had nothing to do with Russiagate and nothing to do with North Korea (where there are no good options).

A debate over Confederate monuments served his purposes admirably. These public statues are incredibly offensive to black people and to liberals in general -- but only when you think about them. The problem: Most people were not thinking about them. The statues have stood in place for decades without causing much of an outcry. Public statuary -- whether good, bad, or ugly -- always tends to fade into the landscape.

Bannon needed to get us thinking about those works. He did not want us thinking about Putin. About the leaks. About global warming. About the mismanagement of every aspect of the executive branch. About Trump's insane tweets, his incessant lies, his frequent travels, his criminal associates, his near-daily demonstrations of dubious sanity. Forget about all of that stuff.

Bannon wanted everyone on the left to decide en masse that a goddamned collection of statuary is the single most important issue on the planet. Ideally, the left-wing websites would become swamped with statue-talk, and anyone who said "Hey, let's get back to Russia" would be damned as a racist.

Left-wing websites are always easy to manipulate through the usual trolling mechanisms. In this way, the entire Democratic party could be forced into advocating a Taliban-esque program of statue demolition.

Guess what? The removal of Confederate statuary is popular with less than a third of the American populace.

Perfect for Bannon. He wants everyone on the left to say: "To hell with Russiagate! To hell with North Korea. Statues. We need to talk about statues. Nothing else matters!"

So Bannon contacted his nationalist buddies and told them to stage an event that would force a National Statue Debate. Richard Spencer got the memo.

Unfortunately, Spencer and his pals went too far. They colored way outside the lines.

They used the event to push their obnoxious ideology. They populated the parade with a bunch of disgusting maniacs, one of whom committed vehicular homicide.

Can't get good help these days.

As a result of Spencer's foolishness, the National Question was no longer "Confederate Statues: Should we destroy them the way the Taliban destroyed those Buddhist statues?"

Instead, the National Question became "Nazism: Good thing or bad thing?"

Hence, Trump's inane response. He made a ham-fisted attempt to shift the National Question from "Nazism: Good thing or bad thing?" back to the intended debate topic: "Confederate Statues: Should we destroy them the way the Taliban destroyed those Buddhist statues?"

That's why Trump pretended that there were "good people" marching with the goosesteppers.

A really smart con-artist could have found the right words -- words which would have condemned neofascism while also shifting the national debate back to statuary. Trump couldn't find the right words. Even when he is handed the right words, he doesn't know how to say them. Every word that comes out of his mouth sounds misspelled.

That's my humble contribution to the genre of Charlottesville conspiracy theories. What do you think?