Wednesday, June 11, 2014

John Kerry, conspiracy theorist

The moral downfall of John Kerry has provided this nation with one of its saddest spectacles. He never should have taken on the job of Secretary of State. He should quit.

Moon of Alabama has caught Kerry in a lie, and not a small one. Although MoA seems to consider the matter amusing, it really isn't. We're talking about peace and war.

On April 8, Kerry announced that he had proof that Russian agents and saboteurs had created unrest in the eastern part of Ukraine. He told the Senate Foreign Relations Committee:
"It is clear that Russian special forces and agents have been the catalysts behind the chaos of the last 24 hours."
Putin was asked about this "proof." He said: "Why don't they show it?"

Kerry could not show this evidence because he did not have any, a fact which he inadvertently confirmed just a few days ago:
Secretary of State John Kerry also spent time talking with Mr. Poroshenko, privately urging him to provide evidence of Russian involvement with separatists with which to confront Russian officials.
I used to have a deep admiration for John Kerry. Now, I'm thinking we should start calling him "Tailgunner John." Or maybe John "James Jesus" Kerry.

Better check under your bed, Mr. Secretary. There's a Roooshian agent hiding under there. I have proof!

On a related front: Most Americans don't know who State Department spokesperson Jennifer Psaki is (even though there has been talk that she'll one day become the White House Press Secretary), but she has attained a weird sort of popularity in Russia, where her statements justifying American policy are seen as a form of high surrealism. In recent days, Psaki has become much less visible, and no-one seems to know why.
Yesterday, on June 5, the question: "Where did Jen Psaki go?" stirred up Russia's blogosphere. Jen's disappearance sparked a heated debate on whether the State Department's spokesperson had resigned from her post or just gone on vacation.

Numerous Russian internet users expressed their deep disappointment with the spokeswoman's absence: Jen's controversial and sometimes absurd comments regarding American and international affairs had already become a sort of entertainment for multi-million Russian audience and given birth to the popular neologism, "psaking"
Her statements have contained geographical mistakes which Russians find hilarious. Some wags have suggested that she's vacationing on a beach in Belarus -- which is landlocked.

In a June 5 tweet, Psaki wrote:
Despite the Russian propaganda machine suggesting otherwise..I am still here as is a strong, democratic Ukraine #dontbelieveRT
Now that is funny. "Strong"? The country is enmeshed in civil war, or something parlously close to civil war, and it owes billions it cannot pay for natural gas that it sorely needs. "Democratic"? With neo-Nazis roaming the streets, with speakers in parliament being shoved offstage by hooligans, and protesters being burned alive? #dontbelieveJen

9 comments:

Trojan Joe said...

Joseph, did you know that John Forbes Kerry was a relative of Michael Paine? I used to like Kerry too, bu when he failed to fight back against the Swiftboaters or ask for an Ohio recount (and then he let that college kid get tased for asking him about Ohio and Skull & Bones), it made me wonder about Kerry's core convictions and ultimate aims. This past weekend, I visited the George McGovern library in Mitchell, SD. Now THERE was a principled Democrat.

Trojan Joe said...

I should add that back in November, Kerry expressed a belief that JFK was killed by conspirators--then he immediately backpedaled, saying it would not be "appropriate" for him to discuss it. Not appropriate for the #4 man in the line of succession to discuss the murder of his hero and the overthrow of the American government? I wonder: Are there blackmail files on EVERYONE who gets within shouting distance of the throne?

Joseph Cannon said...

TJ, don't misrepresent what happened. That "college kid" who got tazed didn't just innocently ask a question. Like most conspira-freaks -- and you, of all people, should know what I'm talking about -- he wouldn't shut up. He wouldn't let other people talk. He insisted on commandeering the situation.

I've met so many guys like that, taking over event after event, making things unpleasant for everyone. Guys like that are the reason I swore off all human interaction and became an "internet only" person.

When I saw the footage of that young cocksure jackass, my first thought was: "Zap him one for ME!"

Anonymous said...

As a Massachusetts resident, my most embarrassing votes were Kerry as Senator, multiple times, and for POTUS 2004, and Obama 2008. I will no longer be voting Dem, only third party or write in Snowden-Manning.

Trojan Joe said...

Fair enough, Joe. But the kid asked two questions that no mainstream reporter dared broach. At the very least, statesman Kerry should have called out to the security guards, "Leave that young knucklehead alone" (instead of retreating into not-my-job mode).

So do you think that Kerry ever met his second cousin Michael Paine?

Joseph Cannon said...

Would it matter if he did? I met Arthur Young, married to Michael Paine's mother. They were a charming, very eccentric old couple. I didn't ask them any questions about you-know-what because it would have been socially awkward, and because they seemed kind of -- well, old.

Sorry to put it that way.

Joseph Cannon said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Joseph Cannon said...

Boy, I just noticed the sexism in that previous comment. I should have said "I met Michael Paine's mother, Ruth Forbes Paine, and her husband, Arthur Young." Sorry!

Ruth, I think, just wanted to go to sleep. Arthur was trying to convince me that one could use a Moebius strip to disprove the four-color map theorem.

prowlerzee said...

Hm, the story about the kid who got tazed made me wonder. Right after Kerry voted for Bush's war, there was a gala event at the Kennedy Library with John Kerry as the keynote speaker. He was speaking to a group of Viet Nam vets, and I knew the organizers through other events...and Kerry was my Senator.

So I donned my shiniest full length gown, went in and settled at a table, and when Kerry took the stage I rose and turned my back to him.

Immediately security came barreling down the aisle toward me. I didn't budge, and at least two vets leapt to my side and others said to "let her be" and the security backed off. One vet stood by me the entire speech, and after it was over another came and hugged me and "thank you."

Now I wonder how I would've fared had I not been in a room full of veterans, whom I've found to be extremely protective of protesters.