Jen here...
(The need for this entry should be obvious to the sane people in our audience.)
Here's a life-saving tip: avoid sociopaths. Psychopaths, too. At all costs.
Don't know what a sociopath looks like or how to deal with one if you encounter him in the course of your daily existence? Screw donating to Cannonfire and use your spare cash to purchase and read these books:
The Gift of Fear, by Gavin De Becker. If you're a parent or care-giver to a young person, I also recommend his Protecting the Gift: Keeping Children and Teenagers Safe (and Parents Sane).
Fear Less: Real Truth About Risk, Saftey and Security in a Time of Terrorism (De Becker again).
The Sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout, Ph.D. This essential guide to understanding the cancer that is sociopathy in our nation posits the idea that 1 in 25 Americans is a card-carrying, empathy-free sociopath. Don't believe it? Read it and see how many of your neighbors, exes and elected officials you recognize in there.
Without Conscience: The Disturbing World of the Psychopaths Among Us, by Robert D. Hare, Ph.D. If you get through any of these other books and still aren't convinced that you need to steer clear of any and all people with this pathology, read this one as well.
And for those posters who will want to get into the differences in the diagnostic criteria for sociopathy, psychopathy, anti-social and dis-social personality disorder, etc., here's a Wikipedia link that gives a decent overview of that topic. It should make readers no less motivated to read and process the material I've linked to above, but I thought I'd throw it out there anyway.
Please read these books.
14 comments:
I've been in the mental health field for over 20 years. Eight of these years were spent treating inmates within a level 1 maximum security correctional facility. The last 5 have been spent in a corporate healthcare settings.
I know what it feels like to be in the presence of pure sociopathy. Prison can be a pretty scary place, too.
Kim in PA
The problem is recognizing them. They can be charming and good at telling you what you want to hear. And the underlying absence of empathy is often well masked.
(also, personally, I think the frequency is somewhat lower than what Stout suggests - no higher than a few percent at most).
BTW - I used to volunteer in a prison (service work to help inmates with drug and alcohol addictions). You learn something about people. Most of the inmates seemed to basically be decent guys, albeit messed up, etc. But some of them really set off my internal hazard sirens along this dimension.
G., the problem most of us face is not only recognizing the sociopath and psychopath, but getting (and staying) the hell away from them should we find ourselves in their clutches. Ever gone head-to-head with a real, live sociopath? It's a scary, dangerous business that turns deadly for many.
The other problem I personally faced after my brush with death at the hands of a sociopath was getting validation for my feelings about the ruination he made of my life. Due to the shockingly high number of sociopaths in our society, especially in the upper echelon of some of our more allegedly respectable professions, (academia, the medical establishment) people who have been mistreated by these parasites often have our outrage brushed off by our peers and therapists as "not that big a deal," or "just something that happens sometimes" (truly; it's pretty fucked up). In many ways, I think we've become desensitized to the brutalization sociopaths and psychopaths inflict on us all (witness: the still-widespread tolerance for both left and right-wing fascism).
G, if you honestly believe we have only a few sociopaths trolling around this country, you need to open your eyes (and actually read the books I posted about).
I strongly encourage anyone who thinks they are dealing with a sociopathic personality, especially in a personal or employment relationship, to take her assessment of the danger seriously and extricate herself from the situation immediately. RUN. To the police and as many other relevant law enforcement agencies as you can.
I also caution anyone who thinks provoking, battling, or even engaging with a sociopath is a worthwhile or safe activity to read the books. Possibly more than once. This includes any campaign staffers or volunteers for major political candidates, and certain pissed-off blog writers. Protect yourselves. Sociopaths care about pretty much one thing, and it isn't you.
By the way, Kim in PA, do you believe sociopaths are treatable? By that I mean, do you believe them to derive any benefit from psychotherapy or behavioral therapies?
What do we do about the ones in political power, like George Bush and Dick Cheney?
And I have my suspicions about Barack Obama.
Carolyn Kay
MakeThemAccountable.com
Jen,
I don't think there are 'only a few'. I just think the frequency is less than 1:25.
And yes, I have personal experience (that I don't wish to go into here). I wouldn't have posted a comment if I didn't think this was a topic of importance.
I mentioned my prison volunteer experience both because of Kim's comment and because I was thinking about a paper I came across last week
http://www.haworthpress.com/store/
ArticleAbstract.asp?ID=38775
And I agree that if the person occupies a 'respectable' position (and especially if they're smooth), others will tend to dismiss your complaints/concerns/incident reports.
Increasingly common in our midst is what Rollo May (in Love and Will) calls the 'schizoid' personality (characterized by apathy, i.e., devoid of love and hate).
Unfortunately, many schizoid personality types are 'diagnosed' by incompetents or by amateurs as being as dangerous as psychopaths. Schizoids eventually destroy civilizations, while psychopaths can ruin societies.
Ellie
Jen,
The corporate/political world is defined by sociopaths, who lack the conscience and good will toward others that defines civil society. (The worst thing is when you have to stumble around them on the job.) Throw in some hubris and presto! An asshole is born -- all too often one in control of your job.
Good for you on posting the topic of sociopathy as it relates to poltics and many of the players and media/blogger sycophants who aspire to feed at the corporate trough, passing off bogus "analysis" that often passes in the sociopathic run msm and elsewhere for "news."
An interesting topic, thanks Jen...
I've mentioned many times that I was in a family for more than 26 years who's directly involved with supporting another White House Coup among many other criminal activities. They weren't involved when I married and my wife seemed normal, until time went by and they got deeper into the mess they are in.
However during my marriage we went out for dinner with the family with MOB and another group who were nicknamed "The Guy's". They were thought to be possibly FreeMasons and gangs involved in the same activities. After marrying, her father tred to get me to become a FreeMason. I attended special meetings and celebrations and more but decided not to join.
It was in the mid-80's that the family grew stranger than ever. Life was becoming really wierd and progressed to be threatening with occassions that hinted of danger. My wife started acting really strange and eventually that brought on a divorce.
While tring to make sense out of what happened, it was very similar to peeling an onion only this wasn't any ordinary onion. Digging into the pile of crap seemed to deeply upset someone as starting in 97, my safety became even more concerning. Having close encounters with personal danger is life changing. Finally after talking to a specialist with an interest in Politics, he directed me to research a topic known as "Authoritarian Personality Disorder".
This area got it's start following WWII. A group of mental health specialists tried to determine why the German people allowed and even seemed to support Hitler's atrocities. My own research confirmed that this personality disorder exists within the family. However, if you know what I know about the current White House Coup, it's most shocking to witness that this disorder also exists throughout our Political and Corporate systems.
A few links to review:
The Authoritarian Personality in Contemporary American Politics
http://www.tikkun.org/rabbi_lerner/news_item.2005-10-27.6168871533
The Politics of the Authoritarian Personality
http://www.worldandi.com/specialreport/2002/December/Sa22748.htm
Anti-Social Personality Disorder
Authoritarian Personality Disorder
http://www.psychnet-uk.com/clinical_psychology/personality_disorders_anti_social.htm
Authoritarian Personality Disorder
http://familyrightsassociation.com/social_work/authoritarian_personality.htm
When dealing with ongoing threatening behavior adding that I personally know about many murders from these people, it was terrifying. I studied personalities and behavior science. Having a rich collection of insanity surrouding me where ever I went, you might want to say, I was doing my lab work all the time. It didn't take long to develop the needed skills in reading behavior that allowed me to determine who was and who wasn't safe to be around. They do have distinct behavior traits and characteristics that if you know what to look for, can help.
When you're out in public everyone has an agenda. When in a social setting, they either have an agenda that includes you or not. Those that don't can be thought to be "genuine". Believe me, no matter how long it takes they will show their agenda. Also, it's important to learn to test others to see what they are made of!
We normally view others through a filter involving what our emotions tells us. In other words, it's much like looking through rose colors glasses tainted by our emotions. You see everything but your emotions tell you want you want to hear. This is very dangerous to follow since we aren't looking at the other person to see who they are as a person. Rather we are following our feelings which will mislead us into thinking something else. This is often found in the act of "finding love". We meet someone who has something special, so we think. Our feelings or the chemistry connection "tricks" us into thinking that this person is it! But the other person is actually telling us through their behavior all about themselves and we aren't paying attention. When the "in love" feeling disappears, we generally start to see them as who they really are.
What's needed is to stop and try to see them as people for a change. Family is another tricky area because we select out friends but we don't select our family. We grow up learning to love them and accept their faults. What we don't do is look at them as people and yet many of us follow those who show to be successful right into a huge mess. People, family or not, are only people and we need to look at each one of them with concern for our own well being. It's likely the reason why my youngest son got involved with Rezko was because he blindly followed family who were bragging, of course, right into a huge mess. He's now stuck in his mess thanks to following family. If he doesn't act quickly, he will screw up his entire future including the future's of his future families.
It's important to remember that communication between people involves approximately the following:
Words - ~12%
Behavior (body language) - ~83%
(facial extressians, eyes, movements, qirks and more, especially while probing for guilt and shame)
Marty Didier
Northbrook, IL
Did I mention it's a bad (and pointless) idea to provoke sociopaths?
Thanks for reading everyone; it seems like this entry did resonate a little.
Jen, in response to your question, no. By definition, sociopathy is devoid of empathy, or conscience.
Treatment can offer many beneficial insights to the sociopath, such as learning more nuanced methods of manipulation, or better ways to game the system. The trouble is, if one does not develop a conscience, a core of moral development, by age 4 or 5they ain't gonna grow one. It's that simple.
Kim in PA
"The trouble is, if one does not develop a conscience, a core of moral development, by age 4 or 5they ain't gonna grow one."
This is the great value of the Roman Catholic Church. Let's face it -- the Church is the world's greatest Guilt Machine. When the space shuttle blew up, every Catholic child's first reaction was "I'm sorry."
Interesting that sociopaths are largely defined by what they lack. They lack the capacity for guilt or empathy. However they're really, really good at faking it.
Morton Thikol lost some 200 million in market shares the day the Challenger exploded. I bet some of those buying puts were good Catholics, too. ;)
Kim in PA
Sociopaths are hard to spot and many times it is too late and the damage has been done:
http://victimsofangela.wordpress.com
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