"I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. Rove"

Did the Bushians hope to stage a fake death for Osama? Joy Tomme has written a delicious column on that theme. I quite enjoyed her recap of the Zarqawi affair:

If you remember, the initial news coverage about Zarqawi reported that he was killed in a US “precision airstrike” when two 500-pound bombs were dropped on his house near Baqouba, Iraq. First, he was killed instantly. Then he wasn’t killed instantly, he lived after the airstrike. Then he not only lived after being hit by two 500-pound bombs, he said a few words. Then he tried to run away after he said a few words. Then it was reported that US soldiers beat the crap out of him after he said a few words, after he tried to run away, after he was hit by two 500-pound bombs. Then he was put on a gurney for medical treatment. However, after heroic measures to save his life, he died alas and George W. Bush got to intone that Zarqawi’s death "is a severe blow to Al Qaeda and it is a significant victory in the war on terror." Which, of course, it wasn’t.

Take a tip from Hollywood, Karl: Don't improvise, unless your name is Robin Williams or Jim Carrey. Stick to the storyboards.