Tuesday, July 31, 2012

"Culture makes all the difference"

In Poland, Romney's traveling press secretary, Rick Gorka, told members of the media "Kiss my ass" and "shove it." He said these words to foster a better sense of reverence at Poland's Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, which Gorka called "a holy place." Gorka's performance reminded me of that B. Kliban cartoon in which one of Jesus' goons pushes an onlooker while shouting: "Don't fuck with the Prince of Peace!"

As you may have heard, Mormons have been known to baptize the dead. I think it may be time to "baptize" the career of the anally-obsessed Rick Gorka.

Although I'm hardly a big fan of our media, one can't blame journalists for seeking any opportunity to ask a question of the unreachable candidate. In Poland, Romney has refused to acknowledge the existence of all reporters -- even the ones from Fox

Contrary to Gorka, I would suggest that journalists have gone easy on Mitt. Remember how the media went to ludicrous lengths, back in 2000, to portray Al Gore as a stiff, unlikable liar? The charges didn't fit Gore, but they sure as hell apply to Romney.

Take, for example, his "cultured" stance...

In Israel, Romney announced that the Jews were more prosperous than the Palestinians because "Culture makes all the difference." He expanded on his thesis by averring that cultural superiority also accounted for the disparity in wealth between the U.S. and Mexico. That'll really help our relations with our neighbors.

Wait: Canada has weathered the current economic storm better than we have. Does this mean they are culturally superior? And Romney is certainly richer than you are. Is he culturally superior? Does culture explain those bank accounts in the Cayman Islands and the mysteriously massive IRA?

We need a fuller account of what Romney said:
“As you come here and you see the GDP per capita, for instance, in Israel which is about $21,000 dollars, and compare that with the GDP per capita just across the areas managed by the Palestinian Authority, which is more like $10,000 per capita, you notice such a dramatically stark difference in economic vitality.”

Romney grossly overstated the Palestinian per capita GDP (it’s about $1,500) while underestimating the per capita Israeli GDP (about $31,000), but the juxtaposition was clear as he segued into an explanation of his “perceptions about differences between countries” based on a Harvard history professor’s book.

“Culture makes all the difference,” Romney said. “And as I come here and I look out over this city and consider the accomplishments of the people of this nation, I recognize the power of at least culture and a few other things.” One of the additional factors he cited was “the hand of providence.”
So if a Russian mobster has more money than you do, God must love him for his cultural superiority. Now you know how $102 million got into Romney's IRA, despite the laws which said that you could put only $2000 into such an account every year. God miracled the cash in there.

Under fire for this remark, Romney later told Fox News pseudoreporter Carl Cameron:
"I'm not speaking about it, did not speak about the Palestinian culture," Romney told Fox's Carl Cameron, taped before the candidate's departure from Poland. "That's an interesting topic that perhaps could deserve scholarly analysis but I actually didn't address that. I certainly don't intend to address that during my campaign. Instead I will point out that the choices a society makes have a profound impact on the economy and the vitality of that society."
Never mind the fact that Romney's earlier words -- "Culture makes all the difference" -- were recorded.

And now Mr. Gorka has his play. If anyone chides him for making uncultured remarks, he can simply insist that he never told anyone to shove it. Anyone who calls him a liar can kiss his ass.

In other cultural news: Rush Limbaugh calls Paul McCartney un-American for not giving his staffers any meat in their free meals.  McCartney responded by hopping in his time machine, going back to 1968, and writing a song about Limbaugh:
In their sties with all their backing
They don’t care what goes on around
In their eyes there’s something lacking
What they need’s a damned good whacking.

Everywhere there’s lots of piggies
Living piggy lives
You can see them out for dinner
With their piggy wives
Clutching forks and knives to eat their bacon.
Big man, pig man, ha ha charade you are.
You well heeled big wheel, ha ha charade you are.
And when your hand is on your heart,
you're nearly a good laugh, almost a joker,
with your head down in the pig bin,
saying, " Keep on digging", pig stain on your fat chin.
What do you hope to find, when you're down in the pig mine?
You're nearly a laugh, you're nearly a laugh,
but you're really a cry.


McCartney is a vegan, but it was George Harrison who wrote "Piggies."

It was also Harrison who was the first Beatle to visit America--in 1963, months before the band appeared on "The Ed Sullivan Show." George visited his sister, Louise, who had married a Yank in the coal-mining town of Benton, Ill., not far from St. Louis. While in small-town America, he bought his iconic Rickenbacker, jammed with a country band at a VFW hall and handed out copies of "Please, Please Me" to puzzled locals (who included a young Benton native named John Malkovich). Undoubtedly, the heartland is where George first saw piggies in the flesh. (By the way, Limbaugh is also from the St. Louis region. Inextricable pork fat flows through his bloodstream.)

Now you know the rest of the story.

Mormonism is what you might call a hyper-heretical offshoot of the Christian Zionist heresy.

The real Zionists judge more assets than liabilities and allow
Romney to join the likes of Falwell
Hagee and Hinn et al.
Sir Paul "Un-American"? He was never American to begin with

Rush is a dipshit
The topic is meat? Meanwhile, over in Africa and other places the WWF is being investigated for selling endangered species hunts to the ultra-wealthy, while indigent residents on the preserves are subject to being shot on sight for endangering the animals' environment.

It's LSD they've been spraying from those planes all these years. Koalaburger with fries, please.
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