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Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Ten reasons to consider Trump

The Des Moines Register says that Donald Trump should "pull the plug" on his candidacy, even though he has surged ahead of the other Republican candidates. By calling Trump a "feckless blowhard," the Iowa newspaper has expressed a clear preference for blowhards who possess feck.

I disagree with the Des Moines Register. Here are ten good reasons why Donald Trump deserves his party's nomination:

1. He is the only candidate who could or would say "Blow me" to Sheldon Adelson, Chaim Saban and the Kochs. (I'm being serious.)

2. Trump is the peace candidate: Since no soldier in his right mind would fight for him, war would become impossible.

3. His nomination would be a great step forward for orangu-Americans.

4. He'd be the first wig-wearing candidate since James Madison. (Yes, James Monroe wore a wig, but he gave up the practice years before his presidency. I'm full of fun facts like that. That's why you come here.)

5. If he gets the nomination, someone will surely ask him how he can simultaneously say that "Mexico has our jobs" and that Mexicans are coming to America to find work.

6. If there's another crash, he will assure the country: "Don't worry about America going bankrupt. Everything's safe. I've arranged it so my personal fortune will not be touched."

7. Europe will announce with one voice: "Fuck this. We're joining BRICS."

8. Trump opposes the TPP treaty. (Not a joke; he really does.)

9. Trump has vowed to protect Social Security. (Not a joke; he really did.)

10. Albert Camus: “The absurd is the essential concept and the first truth.”

Added note. I just thought of reason 11: He likes women with large breasts -- thus, there probably aren't any incriminating photos of Trump carousing with Jeff Epstein's girls. 
Can't be a wig. What self-respecting wig-maker would allow that to leave his workshop?
Don't forget that one of the meanings of the verb "trump" in British English is "fart".
Apparently Scott Walker recently said that any incoming President must be prepared and willing to attack Iran immediately after being sworn in, and no one is writing editorials telling him to go away.

Not an admirer, but Trump can and will say what's on his mind and therefore is perfectly situated to create havoc during the Republican nomination process simply by expressing opinion on verboten topics. Trump's opinions don't matter much, but punching holes in a tightly vetted and controlled process should always be encouraged.
#11: if Trump becomes president, we'll have the hottest first lady in a century or two, even if he changes horses once or twice before he's inaugurated.
I love tumitpt giving out linsdey cell #
During the Republican debate I expect Trump to hit Lindsey Graham with a folding chair when the moderator is looking away.
Anon, you make a good point. Walker's outburst is far worse than anything Trump has said.

Trump's still an idiot, of course.
Some idiots are better than others; for example, Donald Trump is better than George W. Bush or Hillary Clinton.

Moreover, some idiots are better than some intelligent people; Trump is, for example, better than Barack Obama. After all: If, as is now to be expected, Obama gets all three of his big 'trade' deals, he'll be the most disastrous President the U.S. has ever had. If Trump opposes that, then his stepping into the White House would constitute a step up for the American public.
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