Thursday, December 13, 2012

Smile! Bolon is coming!

Well, according to certain internet savants, yesterday marked the beginning of the end of this ol' world, which will come to a speedy conclusion on 12-21-2012.
It is foretold that the completion of the Mayan Calendar brings regeneration of Earth, offering an awakening to all with open hearts and minds. The Mayans, Hopis, Egyptians, Kabbalists, Essenes, Qero elders of Peru, Navajo, Cherokee, Apache, Iroquois confederacy, Dogon Tribe, and Aborigines all believe in an ending to this Great 2012 Apocalyptic Cycle.
The Mayans were known worldwide for their architectural, artistic, mathematical and scientific achievements. With great attention to detail they constructed stone monuments and pyramids with precise computations. Built with purpose, these dates were left to ensure that future generations would be alerted to the end point of this great 26,000 year cycle - The 2012 Apocalypse.

A cycle which corresponds also to a 26,000 year relationship of our Sun orbiting Alcyone, the central star of the 7 Sisters Pleiades constellation. According to the Maya, the "future" which lies beyond this end date is literally a new world age - a new creation - an Apocalypse.

The Mayans believed that December 21, 2012 AD is the culmination of a series of events over time that leads to towards an the ultimate spiritual awakening of the world ( The 2012 Apocalypse ). They believe the changes are underway and will continue steadily accelerating as we head towards this date.
I would question the assertion that the Mayans were "known worldwide" for their achievements. Before the exploration of the New World, who gave them good press?

I would also question the idea that "changes are underway." Seems to me that the human race keeps making the same damned mistakes. (This argument also works against Aleister Crowley's pronouncement that human society embarked upon a New Aeon in 1904. Really? What's so bloody new about it?)

The same Mayan calendar tells us that this world began on August 11, 3114 BC, even though carbon dating proves that lots of stuff existed before that date. Even if we interpret "world" to mean "human civilization," we have to step back before 3114 BC. The ancient city of Gobekli Tepe, in modern Turkey, features a very impressive carved stone temple which was created some 11,000 years ago -- well before the Mayans got their act together.

I don't mean to show the Mayans any disrespect. I'm just saying that if they got the origin point all wrong, maybe the Grand Finale -- or, to use their terminology, the end of the 13th b'ak'tun -- was mis-dated as well.

Some believe that the Mayans predicted that the transition between b'ak'tuns will be marked by the appearance of the Bolon Yokte' K'uh, god of war and strife. If you see him, tell him you like his hat. When dealing with a guy like Bolon, a little sycophancy goes a long ways.

I welcome The End. And it occurs to me: Since we may not live to see the end of this year, this could be our final chance to mount a real war on Christmas. If you're a liberal, I call upon you to live up (or down) to your reputation. Please send in your ideas as to what we can do to ruin this sacred season -- which, if prophecy holds, will be rather severely truncated.

One suggestion: If you hear the words "Merry Christmas" from any retail store employee, complain to management. Demand "Happy Holidays."

We should also demand that churches cover any nativity scenes placed outdoors. After all, we wouldn't want to offend Bolon Yokte' K'uh.

Have a Merry Apocalypse and a happy 14th b'ak'tun!
Comments:
I know you're a little tongue-in-cheek with this, but adherents will have to postpone Mayan Apocalypse.

http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/tech/science/story/2012-05-08/maya-apocalypse-calendar-2012/54879760/1

Ben
 
It's apparent to me that the Mayans, in their transcendent and otherworldly wisdom, foresaw the economic destruction that will be wrought by the "Grand Bargain".
 
Mistranslations abound. Their calendar said the world would be "reborn." Take it for good or ill.
 
The Mayans' calendar ends 10 days before my own does, so I suppose I need to go to Barnes & Noble and get another one for next year.
 
Ben, I was going to share the same link :-)

You'll notice the date on that article is from May of this year, and it actually says "updated" on that date so it probably appeared even earlier. But people don't want their imaginary apocalypse disturbed by facts.

I also read that the calendar that is always shown as the Mayan one is actually Aztec and doesn't even go as far as 2012.

Besides all that, the Mayans never said the world was ending or that any catastrophe of any type was going to happen. Merely that one age was ending and another was beginning. The only change they talked about was in consciousness.

http://www.washingtonsblog.com/2012/12/hear-the-2012-prophecy-direct-from-the-mouths-of-the-mayan-priests.html

Still, I'd be okay with a real cataclysm, since everyday life can get so dull and repetitive in our modern society.
 
"But people don't want their imaginary apocalypse disturbed by facts."

Well, I sure as hell don't. And I wish people would stop harshing my buzz.
 
Cheer up Gus...We still have the incoming CME's.

Ben
 
Local pub having end of world party. All welcome.
 
Since we haven't got much time left, I'll share with y'all some thoughts I had this evening.

First I read about how the Brits are talking down Russia to their home market, using the Litvinenko case.

Why, I wondered, might they be doing that now? Yes, yes, I know the chancery lawyers in London are making a packet out of this, as they advertise London as a centre for m̶o̶n̶ey̶ l̶a̶un̶d̶e̶ri̶n̶g̶ efficient civil justice. Hence the call for the Russian state to be represented at the inquiry. Talk about diversification! The judgment in the Berezovsky-Abramovich case (which, for those who don't already know, was the bigge$t civil case in world legal history) read like an advertisement for the English civil bar.

But...but...could they also be arranging some pieces on the table, prior to a big bout with Russia, focused on Iran? I think they could.

So off I toddle to Pravda's website to have a look at what the Russians are saying.

Holding back the nausea I feel when I have to recognise the existence of West-olatry in places like Russia, Arabia, or Latin America, what do I read? The Russians are talking up a 'flash mob' in St Petersburg, in which a thousand young people stand and dance in the formation 12-12-12, to tell everyone that this is a date that will bring happiness and joy to us all, and not - perish the thought! - the end of the world, as has, er, been predicted several times already in their short lifetimes.

I tell you one thing - that isn't going to go down very well with the old-lady constituency in Russia.

Or even in Moscow. St Petersburg has long been the 'western' capital as well as the northern one.

The notion of the apocalypse weighs heavy in Russian Orthodoxy and society.

Looks to me as though to their own home market the Russian authorities are bigging this notion up (not that they've got much choice, but hey, since when was this not about destiny?) in the run-up to the end of the 13th b'ak'tun.

They're assisting with polarisation, which is what it's all about, surely?

If anyone is sceptical about the development of this spiritual polarisation in Russia, get your brain cells around Pussy Riot member Maria Alyokhina’s closing statement in which she quoted Nikolai Berdyaev.

Is Billionaire Boris Berezovsky going to enter stage left, in the role of some demented version of Tchaikovsky's Von Rothbart (cartoon, anyone?) in Swan Lake, giving his all to the notion of 'saving Russia'?

Watch this space.

BOLON YOKTE K'UH!
HONKY BLOKE OUT!
NUKE BY HOT LOOK!
 
Earth will be demolished to make way for an interstellar bypass.
 
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