Hope you had a marvelous Fourth of July. Being a Democrat, I spent part of the day trying to teach a four-year-old girl how to sing the Internationale
and the French national anthem.
I saw a parade go through a Baltimore suburb. One group of paraders wore t-shirts bearing the words "Thank you, Henrietta!" This message referred to Balmer native Henrietta Lacks
, who (unwittingly) provided the "immortal" carcinoma cells widely used by researchers. In this town, it has become fashionable to speak of Henrietta Lacks as if she were a pioneering scientist, even though her only contribution was accidental. Young people who never heard of Jonas Salk seem to be under the impression that Henrietta Lacks cured polio.
Well, never let it be said that Baltimore does not remember her daughters and sons.
The main attraction was the Edgar Allen Poe float, in which several local beauties played teenaged corpses while their boyfriends got drunk. The Nancy Pelosi float (yes, she was born here) became the target of rotten vegetables tossed by Republicans and
Democrats. The Alger Hiss marchers handed the kids small plastic pumpkins with free surprises inside. The Spiro Agnew Memorial Float puzzled many: Apparently, he is no longer a household word. I quite enjoyed the pole dancers on the Emily Post float.
Tupac Shakur himself made a surprise appearance when his memorial float broke down in front of the Family General on Shipping Way. He stopped and waved at the fans for about 15 seconds. Too bad you weren't there.
The Dundalk Intellectual Society demonstrated an impressive ability to count to 17 in unison, a performance marred only slightly by the frustrated participant who kept repeating "Thirteen and a half, thirteen and a half." The Dundalk Library Association proudly displayed their book. The Ayn Rand Pamphleteers handed out free copies of Atlas Shrugged
while informing spectators that they were guilty of Collectivist Thought if they did not agree with Ayn's philosophy.
All in all, a terrific Fourth.