The world ended today. Your mind could not process the the information, so you continue to hallucinate a "normal" existence on planet Earth. From now on, you will occasionally receive subtle messages intended to acclimate you to the truth. You know, sort of like that scene in Inception
where Michael Caine tells Leo Whatzisname "Come back to reality." Like that. Except I'm not going to introduce you to Ellen Page. Look, do you really
want to meet Ellen Page? I mean, did you even see Hard Candy
I seem to have gotten off track. The point is this: What you are reading right now is the first of many quasi-subliminal messages ingeniously designed to clue you in. There will be others...on bus benches, on candy wrappers, hidden in the small print in chocolate chip cookie dough baking instructions. That sort of thing. I might even have Katie Couric just blurt out "You're all DEAD!" on TV, except I'm not convinced that anyone is watching her. Eventually, the truth will just kind of sneak up on you.
I'm actually a very clever entity, you know. Ask anyone.
PS. I think I've finally got Inception figured out, at least most of it. Look, you have to assume that the whole thing is a dream, because the "real" parts of the story (like the chase scene in Africa) are just too ridiculous to take seriously. So when Mal killed herself, she really did wake up. Besides, if the "real" parts were really real, then the whole movie would be kind of a bummer, because Saito (a jerk) gains control of the world's energy supply and I was rooting for the nice rich kid with Daddy issues.
Wait. An alternate theory just popped into my celestial noggin. Maybe Leo Whatzisname did kill Mal and everything that happened afterward was just a psychotic break from reality. In other words, Inception and Shutter Island are the same damn movie.
Do you think I should have given a spoiler alert? Bear with me. You'd be surprised how confused I get.